Parenting tips
No matter how resolute we are that the arrival of a new baby will not affect the love and attention we lavish on its older siblings, once a new baby arrives, the world as we know it changes. Although we do not love our older children any less, seeing to a baby and its many needs is all consuming in time and energy, which in turn can cause sibling rivalry.
Possibly the easiest way to combat potential feelings of resentment and rivalry is to try and include the older child as much as possible in the baby's routine, teaching them how to care for and interact with the baby. By doing this you will replace any negative feelings they may have with positive emotions of usefulness and protectiveness. This of course does not replace the individual attention an older sibling needs and craves but will go some way to helping them adapt and deal in the decrease in personal attention. You must remember though, that if a child does not wish to be involved in this way, pushing them into it may have a detrimental effect.
Especially in the early days after the arrival of a new baby, the only thing a parent wants to do when a baby is sleeping is to sleep themselves, making it seem impossible to make extra time for older children. A good trick is to use the quiet time: - put on a DVD the older child enjoys, grab a blanket, some snacks and just snuggle on the sofa giving the child the one to one closeness they need and the parent some rest.
Make feeding time story time. If you are bottle rather breast feeding and can’t hold a book, then turn it into a game, each making up part of the story. Alternatively, if they want to play, sit down to feed with a soft (tennis ball sized) ball and play a game of catch (fetch for younger children), rolling the ball along the floor and getting them to return it to you.
There will always be times where even the most adjusted child will feel neglected or resentful of the attention being divided away from them. All we can do as parents is make the transition as easy as possible and emotionally reassure them at every opportunity. The main thing to remember is that these feelings are natural and as long as we make things as easy as we can on the child, we’ve done our best.